Hi and welcome HiddenZebra
I could be at deaths door one morning after a binge and then feeling good three days later and start it all over again.
Coming to SR, and posting and reading daily, really helped get me out of that cycle. I found it much harder to rationalise my problem away when I was thinking about it on a daily basis, helping others with their issues, and my own story was there writ large in black and white
D