Hi Annne...
I have worn those shoes you were wearing yesterday many, many times.
Being the stubborn girl I am, I fought any sort of regiment required to get sober. I was caught up in the chaos of it all...
Again and again I have had to come to the painful conclusion that I have had no success in getting sober alone... as much as I hate to admit that I am not the fierce self-sufficient, "I dont need anyone" "I can live off the land if I have too."
I have great survival tools to survive in the wilderness... : will eat
But when it comes to overcoming my addiction to alcohol, I struggle finding the tools that will help me overcome its powerful grasp.
I have found great spiritual reprieve in working some kind of program that involves interaction with other's who are alcoholic like me.
We have to admit that we are truly interrelated with all of life... it simply is not realistic to think that we always have to stand alone at the summit, fighting the elements.
Anyway, I have to deal with bi-polar issues as well as my addiction to alcohol.
I deal with them seperately....
AA for Alcoholism
good psych dr. for mood disorder... depression management.

We have meetings here on-line... you might want to check one out.
There is one tonight, here is a link that will give you the details.

http://soberrecovery.com/forums/showthread.php?t=47653