Thread: Fear Solution
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Old 11-25-2013, 03:42 AM
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Joe Nerv
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Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Bklyn. NY
Posts: 1,859
A Course in Miracles, and most new age spiritual beliefs claim there are only 2 emotions that we act out of. Love, and fear. In the end of my drinking, 99% of what I did was out of fear. I couldn't put a % on where I'm at now, but most of what I presently do is clearly from the other side. The past 29 years has been a much deeper mission for me than just a path away from drugs and alcohol. It's been a journey out of fear, and into love. And as GracieLou already stated, that fear has come in many, MANY, different forms. From agoraphobia and panic, to fear that I'm going to forget to bring my lunch to work today, to about a billion things in between.

Faith has been what's saved me. Faith in a HP that I've chosen to call God, yet doesn't really fit the description or definition I learned as a child. One of the greatest lessons I've learned regarding fear and faith I've shared here before... hope I have time to type it, gotta get out to work...

About 3 years into sobriety I was at a water park. They had a cliff diving pool, and I decided I was going to challenge my fear of heights. There were 2 levels to jump from, I chose the lesser. I climbed the ladder, got to the edge of the cliff, and froze. Couldn't do it. 8 year olds were yelling at me to jump so they could go, and I stepped aside, feeling very much like a fool. I realized that prayer had gotten me through so much more than this silly jump into a pool, and decided I'd have a go at it for this. It had to work. I closed my eyes, prayed for courage, got back to the edge of the cliff, and somehow managed to jump. As I was going down I thought my heart was going to explode with fear. When I landed in the water, my heart was racing, I was shaking, feeling weak, and I was cursing God for not taking the fear away. I swam to the side of the pool, feeling like total crap, mad that my "faith" didn't work, and then it occurred to me that it did work. Perfectly. I got to the other side of the fear.

That was monumental for me because I had always believed that faith meant the absence of fear. For some, maybe that's true, but not for me. From that silly simple lesson I learned that faith meant I would have the courage to walk through my fears. And through that faith and experience of walking through them, they often disappear completely in time.

There were of course times where faith did actually eliminate fear in me, but much more often than not my experience has been as above. Faith gave me courage, time and experience healed the fear.
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