I'm really sorry TX. My heart goes out to you. I want you to know you are in my thoughts today.
My son lives 4 states away. I have sent him a consistent message for well over the past year that help is available to him when he wants it. I have nothing else to bargain with. He doesn't live with us, we provide nothing for him any more....I'm not a fan of "hitting bottom" either but just not sure what else we can do but wait for him to have a moment of clarity and hopefully he'll decide to ask for help. I think he's proven over the last 6 years that it doesn't matter to him what we think...I've reached the point I've just got to hand it over. Do I want my son to hit bottom? No. I want him to know he is loved and we believe in him...however I cannot throw him over my shoulder any longer and pack him off to summer camp. I wish, that would be great.