I have been having a lot of trouble finding words to post onto other's threads lately. However, I seem to be right behind you in your journey. I am recently separated from my AH and struggle everyday with the notion of what to do with myself. All I know is my relationship. I have been away for only four months, and getting those checking-in calls, at least when AH was sober, is what I miss too. I am also going away on a vacation in January to see if I want to click my heals to a new location. I really have nothing new to add. I just wanted to let you know that I understand.
Keep the focus on you in the present, and as I have been reading- everything will be okay all in time. ((Hugs))