Originally Posted by
Hawkeye13 
I think the addict inside does chill when it really gets that you finally mean it.
It has for me. I was so shocked by the depth of my relapse and how terrible with detox was due to kindling, that I decided that was it for good and ever, with no little "maybes" or exceptions for drinking again.
I meant and I mean it, and boy, the AV made a half-a$$ effort and has really backed off since then. I finally feel that this can, with continued vigilance, be over for me. I go days sometimes without even thinking about drinking or not drinking. That's a first.
So there is light at the end of serious intention and commitment. That's not to say that I don't / won't have moments of weakness and stress, but the longer I am sober the less I feel that Mr. AV can get in the driver's seat.
It's worth working towards :-)
That is sage advice. I am in the midst of kindling and it sucks. I really do not want to go through this again. During my recent relapse, I remember most of the time I had the wherewithal to realize that I hated it; I hated being addicted and drinking just wasn't fun. I was just drinking to stave off withdrawals. Pretty sad, really.