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Old 11-11-2013, 05:11 PM
  # 52 (permalink)  
Ptcapote
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Washington, DC
Posts: 987
I'm still in early recovery (9 months) so I am sort of on the fence on this one too. I agree with Deeker's implied point above, though. One of the nicest things I have found in recovery and in a recovery program is the fact that it really drives home self-awareness and personal responsibility. Two very attractive qualities in my book. HOWEVER, just because someone is in recovery does not mean that they have those qualities, even if they are working what appears to be a strong program. I have met some of the most genuine guys in recovery who I would very likely consider dating. I have also met some of the biggest creeps who I wouldn't have gone near even while drinking A LOT.

In AA, there is a pretty big focus on the fellowship aspect which means that you spend a lot of time around others in the program. Of course you don't have to do this, but it is there if you want it or need it. For me, I have taken advantage of it and I believe it has been an integral part of keeping me sober. So, right now, I am much more attracted to or amenable to the idea of dating a recovering alcoholic because some of the ones I am friends with now are some of the best people I have met in a long time. The men as well as the women.

Dating a non-drinker, at the least, would probably be a prerequisite for awhile for me though. I really can't imagine being around someone on a regular or intimate basis who drinks. That may change over time but, for now, I just can't see it.

So, yes, I would date a recovering alcoholic. But, like everything else in life, there are many other facets of a person to consider.
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