Autan:
Have you considered that it may very well be the addiction inside you (some call it the "addictive voice"), which is definitely not your friend, which is far from "normal", which is suggesting to you that sobriety is "boring", "sucks", that Christmas is not Christmas without getting, as your friends say, "wasted". Odd way to celebrate the birth of Christ. To get "wasted", completely drugged out on booze, which does nothing more than add to the depression, cause all sorts of family problems under the guise of "good will". All the drinking is really pretty much of a scam game run by the merchants to boost sales. It's tough at first getting sober, getting free of the addictive voice, but once you get over that tough period you will find you're a lot happier and you can adjust your social life so that you're comfortable with that.
W.