Wow SteveJr
thank you for that. I think maybe I need the Holocaust because I gave up before rock bottom. I skipped the denial phase all together. I was lucky enough to have had an alcoholic mother and ex-husband and so could cut myself off at the pass - so to speak. I was so terrified of ruining my life that I got out while I was ahead. So I don't really have any personal horrors to refer to.
Posts like yours make me feel very lucky and blessed to have had my childhood and my first marriage. They taught me so much and ultimately saved me.
Unfortunately I can't get my head round prayer and handing over to a higher power so the courage of others becomes my god.
Have a great day everyone.