So, I had my party, and it was a really nice time. I had several women here and we had a great time chatting. My best friend in town, who used to be my neighbor, but moved across town, stayed until nearly 1AM! And, I nearly cried when my friend from England had to leave. ;( I miss her. She is so nice and we always had an immediate bond as we worked in the same profession. It is a bit like a sorority.
Time to confess that I had a few glasses of wine. I am not drunk, and there are no more open bottles. I have a problem when I entertain, or go to an event, that my head buzzes and I cannot get tired and get to sleep. I would drink more after coming home or after guests left, to get tired. I am done, I do not want to have more and to feel sick or have my heart racing after a few hours, but it is tempting to try to use it to get sleepy. And I did have one of those few glasses after the last guest left. And logged on here, rather than having more.
Both of my children have ADHD. I wonder if I do. Maybe that is part of this wound up feeling I have when I socialize. Anyone else have that. I feel so wired and the conversations run through my head for hours. It is like a buzz you have in your head after a loud rock concert.
So, I did drink, but not drunk, and well, it is done. I had a great time with the friends and actually did not drink until hours into the evening. I had fun sober. I just sort of ended up doing it out of habit and casualness. Like Kaneda was describing. It felt like I needed to, but it did not make the time any better. It really changed nothing. I just felt more like I fit in, but really, it didn't matter. A few ladies did not drink at all.
Oh well. Sigh. I wish I felt tired, though. I do not have a busy day tomorrow, so hopefully I can nap. I never can sleep late.