Rehab sent him Home !!
Yesterday I went to the rehab to have the weekly family session with my husband. At the end of the session, the doctor started telling us a story about teaching his daughter to swim. He said she was afraid of the water, and he tried to slowly introduce her to it. She would play in the shallow water, and became content. So one day he put the life jacket on her, and plopped her straight into deep water. She was scared at first but realized she could float, and her daddy was with her. She became calm and soon learned swimming strokes, later turned into a fish loving the water.
Then he said he was throwing us into the pool ! He wanted us to go home together. Spend the next 3 days and come back on Thursday for a family session. And you know what I said, "But I have my own counseling session here on Thursday". He laughed and said we will work around it ! My husband hasn't graduated rehab yet, he will be going back for a little while still, this is a test.
He said that's what life is about being ready to face our fears, challenges, the unexpected. He asked if I was supposed to work the next couple days, what my routine was and I told him. He said sounds great, don't deviate, allow yourself to adjust to his being home, and spend time together like normal.
Car keys back to my husband, cash in his pocket, choices to make. He said we have life jackets on, we are both ok, we will float. He stopped short of calling himself daddy like in the story, but he said he is there if we need him during this time.
Here's the good things so far:
I loved waking up with him next to me
I forced myself to work today, followed dr orders
I only called him once so far
He called me once
We have the evening set up, I'm excited
I was feeling a lot of emotions, some fear once I had been at work a while. I stopped, meditated a little, remembered we both have new skills, we both have on life jackets. I can be calm and let my husband practice his new swimming strokes. If I get scared, I think about a pool and both of us learning to face our fears, some unfounded, some very real. One day we will both take off the life jackets and swim like fish.
You put a fish in water, it knows what to do !