Thank you all for your responses. I am getting to the end in terms of making a decision. He went out on Friday and is playing the "I'm done. No more!" role today. And I, of course, am thinking "only until the hangover wears off." Been through it too many times.
If we do divorce I don't think he is going to put up a huge fuss but one never knows. The house is not marital property so he, at most, would be entitled to the value of any enhancements he contributed to during our marriage. Really nothing considering I've only put in new windows. Savings? None. Retirement? Not much. Cars? Each own our own old clunkers.
I did actually file for divorce about two years ago. Could not get AH served because he was in Florida. Then he got sober and we reconciled. Attorney should still have paperwork and remainder of retainer just in case.
It is almost a relief when he disappears for a day or so because he doesn't throw our routine into chaos and the kids an I enjoy ourselves. Sad, really. Knowing that we can do this without him.
And the comment about"why aren't you dead" or something similar. I have had those thoughts. Thinking that if he were dead I could get his social security for the kids and it would be a darn sight more reliable than expecting him to make it home with his paycheck.