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Old 10-18-2013, 08:13 PM
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Ruby2
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Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 9,029
How many have walked away?

I am sitting here knowing that my AH/addict husband is not coming home tonight. Knew it this morning when I got the kids up, made their lunches, took them to school and then came home and got myself ready for work while AH slept away. Just had "that" feeling. Worked a full day, picked up the kids and came home. A never ending cycle of me being virtually a single parent.

We have been through this roller coaster for almost nine years. His addiction, my alcoholism. My one treatment, his two. three. It has gotten to be enough. I stayed with him for the kids. I stayed for what small help his paycheck would be when and if he came home with the check. I stayed because i kept thinking we loved each other and could work through this. That when sober and working a program he really is a charming and warm person. When not, like now? Nightmare.

When and did you finally realize that you could not handle this any more? I am so tired. I thought after he had been sober over a year that we were on the right path but he started drinking again in August and the crack demons seem to have followed soon behind. And the train wreck continues. I have lost count of how many times I have been through this. When did you just say enough?
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