Your husband is exactly who he is ...
Just remember the one place you will never lead yourself astray is by looking at what is, not what was. The is, is always subject to change. He may move on from here and be the man you need him to be. A man he can be look back upon with no regret because he took the time ... grateful, humbled by the chances given to him. Or he may just have been showing you through his addiction that he is a lot more than you ever knew.
There is a lot of unknown out there...
You must educate yourself, learn about yourself ... if there an inexplicable truth in this all it is ... that we react because of who we are, we see when we see because of who we are, we don't understand at times the danger we are in because of who we are and we will grown and learn or choose not to because of who we are. And nothing has to do with them.
Take care of you. Work on you.
He will show himself, in time ...