It is slow suicide. Alcohol doesn't jump into our mouth. It is inanimate, and cannot have intent, good, or bad. For me, to quit, I had to take full responsibility and stop thinking I drank because of the actions of others, external or internal pain, or that alcohol manipulated me. I have no issue with using those schemas as convenient expressions of feeling like there is an opponent. If there were a devil involved it needs a deal, we have to do it. If there are voices inside our own head it is us, and we have to do it. If thinking that my drinking was externally caused, that alcohol could mesmerize me from the store into going and picking up, and I was helpless when external temptations to drink occurred, well I could see a lot of revolving door relapses.
I pick up. Not a voice or demon.
My mind was like an unmade bed while drinking. I made my mind up. I bypassed the whole external construct as a cause and did whatever it took because my mind was no linger unmade.
I made my mind up.