Susan80

I told my partner that I am no longer going to drink alcohol and his reply was, "What? Again?!!" I suppose i can't blame him as in the past i have lapsed but I am quite upset that he is not taking me seriously. Last night he stayed at the the bar until 4am drinking and talking about work (he manages the place) and I went home alone to have a night in front of the tv. He is so focused on problems at work and his own life that he never seems to spend time with me or isn't concerned how I feel. I am painting him as the "bad guy" but he really isn't... he is just so caught up in the world of alcohol (being a manager of a bar!) that if I don't go to the bar then I don't see him. I have always been the one to adapt my life to his plans but as I really want to succeed in my sobriety, I am thinking that if I do my own thing and persue healthier and alcohol free persuits then he will see that I am serious about quitting. We have been together for 11 years and alcohol has played a large part in our relationship throughout the years. . . both good and bad.. . mostly bad if i am going to be honest. I want to have a life that does not revolve around alcohol or his bloody bar and moreover, I want to gain some self respect. I don't want to lose him but I cannot go on living a drunken life hanging around a bar all the time. I have tried talking to him but as he has stress at work he never wants to discuss it. I think this is due to the fact that he doesn't believe me and I make myself too available?? I don't want to play games I just want him to realise that something MUST change and take me seriously. . . .