But the problem is I want him. I just want him sober, completely sober." (Free the Love)
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Oh FreetheLove, this is NOT how this works.
While you have some valid "what ifs" running through your mind, I can only assure you that there is absolutely no way of knowing if he is ever going to quit drinking.
If you want to choose to start basing your life on the facts of this serious situation a lot of those "what if's" will vanish.
I would let go of the romantic movie that is currently playing, and come to the present and face the fact that I probably have all these feelings for someone who is NOT currently available. The only way I know to handle issues like this is to get real honest with myself and face the truth. ( and yep, it's going to hurt for awhile)
your boyfriends battle with alcoholism is NOT UNIQUE, he is no different than anyone else who is struggling with active addiction.
Let's just fast forward for a minute here, what do you think his life is going to be like when he gets released from prison? He's not going to have a driver's licence, how is he going to get back and forth to work? In the event, he is granted a restricted licence, the cost of insurance, and other fees associated with getting your licence back are astronomical, he'll be lucky to have enough money to buy a can of beans at the end of the week. Also employers do these background checks now days, he may have great difficulty in even finding gainful employment. it would be real easy to become resentful being the sole provider for the household.
And you know what, none of the above is your problem, set yourself free, pick yourself up, brush yourself off, and go do what 24 year women do, Live your life, currently he has nothing to offer you.
You have the power of choice, you get to decide if you want to continue to hurt and feel the way you currently do, or you can choose exit the crazytrain.
Doing the right thing is never easy, but I can assure you you will not always feel like you do today.
Get proactive in your own life, and allow him the consequences of his choices.