Oh my... remembering my boundary settings!
It was always " I will not have an active alcoholic in my house".
My XA must have had 15 relapses and every time he disappeared and drank I would pack up his belongings and put them in storage! Ridiculous really...because he would drink for awhile (relapse vacations I call them)... then show remorse, go into detox, rehab, AA blah, blah, blah, quack, quack, quack.
I would let him move back in because he was sooooo sweet and sober and all and a few weeks, months later we would rinse and repeat all over again!
Soooooooo.... I finally got it in my hard head that he needed to be sober an entire year and that worked!
No...he has never stayed sober a year so my recovery is going great! He still drinks, stops, drinks, stops and quacks a lot.
He lives out West in either Vegas, LA or Scottsdale and I am in Florida! I Haven't seen him two years but he swears he still loves me deeply and this time IT WILL BE DIFFERENT!
Yeah, yeah, yeah... call me in a year and I will meet you in Tahiti!