You took a very big and brave step in getting your own place and making sure that you would be settled. It's hard to let people we love go and have them pick a destructive path. It's heart breaking. Is it beneficial to your path to live with him? Will you be able to grow and live in peace? I know for me I want peace. I deserve peace. I know when my husband is actively using I don't get that peace. I hope you find peace and clarity and make the decision that best fits your life. I will be thinking of you!