Thank you sevenofnine,
I would be lying if I said I wasn’t worried about our being first time parents, and how that will fit in with his stress level, and triggers for drug use. Even if he gets clean right now, he wont be that many months into recovery, learning to use the skills he will learn, apply them to situations, and feelings.
I know relapse is common especially early on, It weighs on me, and I talk about it in the counseling sessions already. Im doing my best to put one foot in front of the other while trying to do all the things I think will lead me to solid ground no matter what.
I am lucky that I have a supportive family, and I know on a moments notice I could pack up and head to my mom and dads, even with a screaming infant they would be happy to have us there. I guess that is one of my backup plans. Im also socking away all of my paycheck right now. When I increased my hours at work, my husband was upset by the decision. In the end, he understands Im afraid though, and while I think he views my fear as temporary, he told me to hoard it all away so I would feel more secure. I do actually. I will have a nest egg all my own built up before the baby comes, just in case we run into problems. It would help to know what other actions people took to secure themselves, those who have decided to stay and ride it out, taking the hopeful wait and see approach. Maybe I will make a new thread asking that one.