Originally Posted by
Aborigine 
I feel very alone and trying deperatly not to drink myself numb like she did, instead I'm being prescribed anti depressants and sedatives, but none of those feel as good as being drunk. At least I socialize. Being medicated has me laying in bed and posting on forums.
Maybe its grief that is really the culprit here. Give yourself some time to simply feel. But know you are not alone. This thread shows that. Al-Anon meetings could help, as could AA if you're struggling with alcohol issues.
That first step is always the hardest, but it does get easier...
Peace,
~T