Twofish,
I am sorry for your hurt. I have also hurt like you said...physically and mentally. I use to pray for a nervous breakdown so I could go to the hospital and "rest" I am married to a AH(meth) he lives in another state. Our divorce is tied up in court. ....thanks alot "justice system" I totally get the blame game at therapy. It gets old. My son is also an addict. He was just in jail for beating his wife in march.
I left my husband in april.
All I can tell you is you need to put some distance between you and your addict.. Whether or not that is good advice IDK. I am sure someone here will let us know... Some here have better advice than me. I had to cut off my husband and son for the most part. My son is better now. But there are still days I just can't listen to his bs on the other end of the line.....same goes for the AH...so i just let it ring....
I am trying to work, raise 3 girls, and go to school.... barely making it. So I just don't have time to listen to quacking.....
As for advice with the comebacks. I personally think that is a waste of time and energy. I use to do it. I am so tired of my AS and AD husband blame everything but them selves for there addiction. I have told my son on more than one occasion. There comes a point when you can't blame me or your dad for this any longer. We were not perfect parents. It is your choice to put that bottle to your mouth. We have both tried to get him into therapy and rehab. But he won't go. So now I see it as a choice.
As with my AH he also refuses rehab and therapy. I finally left because he was not only killing me mentally but, physically. (my dr. told me I was on a verge of a stroke at 39)
So I just had to leave him. I have begged for him to go to rehab. But now I realize that it is his choice not to go and suck on that glass pipe instead.
Let them make there choice. Don't kill your self cleaning up there mess. And it sounds like you have other children to take care of? What good are you going to do them if you are dead yourself?
Take care of you!
I am sorry your husband bailed.....men... i swear....
Someone just told me the other day. You have more strength than you think you have. Take a little space. Sometimes a little goes a long way
