I feel like I wrote this. My story is so parallel. I waited until my early thirties to get married. I went through the similar struggles and heartache with my marriage. My husband chose the bottle to deal with his childhood pain. Everyone is telling me how strong I am and all I want to do is fall apart. I am also dealing with the paperwork for divorce. It is a rollercoaster. I didn't want this. Any of it. But my husband doesn't want help and I don't want to live like this. So, I am picking up my head and moving forward.
Cheers to doing what it takes to find our own happiness!