One more thing that may help (or may not
) - in reference to your post title, "When will things be normal?"... I had to stop looking for that & realize that Normal didn't exist for us any longer. We would never move forward as a family unchanged by addiction so I could make myself anxious waiting for "normal" to show back up or I could decide to change my definition.
I didn't even realize how much I was holding out for that return to "Normal" but I can tell you that it felt like I released oceans of anxiety when I shifted my perspective & decided to accept a "New Normal" for our family.
It was very freeing because I got to make changes in my behavior & attitude too - it hasn't all been about working around RAH & his battle with sobriety. I kind of broke the mold of who I was & started opening up for new experiences & ideas. I don't have a crystal ball that tells us where we are going to end up on any given day, but in the end I want to remain someone that I like & love.