Hello GoingAlone...you are in a tough spot sweetie...you will know when the time is right as far as leaving when the pain of staying is greater than the thought of the pain of leaving...right now he is feeding his addiction and he is only doing what addicts do. My ExAH was very similar to your husband as far as being needy attention grabbing while drunk and it is very mind debilitating so I can sympathize with you - are you going to any Al-Anon meetings anywhere ?
Janitw