GoingAlone2

This is going to be long, but I don't know where else to turn & I need advice from people who can relate. I'm too embarrassed to talk to anyone else I know about it & I don't want them to think less of my family. My husband and I have been married 10 years and we have 2 young children. He is a well respected man in the community & everyone sees us as the "sweet family". I've been covering for his alcoholism for a while, but it's to the point I can't anymore. He won't go to AA bc he doesn't want anyone to know or make them think less of him. He's always had an addictive personality & has kept it in check for most of the time I've known him, however over the last year or two he has slipped back into old routines & it's worse than I've ever seen it. At this point he is drinking 18-24 beers several nights a week & always at least 7 or 8. I don't think he's drinking during the day, but if he doesn't have a beer by 5:00 he starts showing signs of withdrawal. Then he retreats to the basement & drinks on his own for the rest of the night. I've stopped having friends over & going out with other couples bc he gets so drunk he's obnoxious. I've talked to him over & over about how it's ruining our marriage & he says "I know. I understand" then it's back to the same thing.
He is a wonderful man & I respect him so much, but I can't live like this. It's like he is two different men. I can't talk to him about business or family issues bc how he responds or wants to handle a situation when he's drinking is completely different than when he's sober. Or even worse he can't remember that we talked about it & gets upset at me the next day for how I handled it. He also goes off on these crazy tangents instead of discussing the facts. He's not a violent drunk, but instead turns into the "clingy/needy" drunk. I have two small kids. I'm tired at the end of the day, but instead he starts drinking & wants "attention". A drunk man is a HUGE turn-off to me & I can't stand to be around him. He'll stay up drinking until midnight or later most nights (sometimes even 3am) and it keeps me up. We run a business together & so I'm dealing with him 24-7. I can see the drinking is wearing on him & it's starting to effect our business. I've even started having panic attacks when I'm around him just from the stress of everything.

I don't want to tear my family apart, but I don't see him trying to change at all. I feel like I only have two choices, stay & just accept that this is my life & all the stress & drama that comes with it or leave & ruin the kid's lives. I've talked to him over & over & even told him, "You have to choose your family or the beer" & he said I choose my family, but he keeps drinking. Should I just ignore it & pretty much give up on the marriage we used to have or should I leave? I feel like I have no where to turn.