LUCAN, she is not drinking to hurt you--yes, you are hurting--but, her motivation to drink is because she is an alcoholic. That is the only way she can "quiet" the powerful physical discomfort and the mental compulsion (powerful) compulsion to drink. A drink feels like "survival" for her.
Total abstainence is the only thing that can put this into remission for the alcoholic. That will be in her hands. That decision will have to come from within her--when (or if) it comes. There is nothing m ore that you can do--except get out of her way--and save yourself and child.
Have you thought of alateen for your daughter, by the way? Perhaps, you have addressed this--but I didn't go all the way back with your posts..sorry.
I know that this is hard.
dandylion