You're taking the words of addicts to heart in re: your own addict boyfriend and your relationship. YOU ARE NOT TO BLAME FOR YOUR ABF DRINKING! And you are certainly not wrong in creating boundaries for yourself. You're letting these guys live rent free in your head when they have no business being there. If your ABF wants to stay sober, that is all on him. Nobody else can make him drink, just like nobody else can make him stop drinking. Is he working a program? If not, and he's still hanging out with active addicts, then I would buckle up and hold on tight. It's probably going to get very bumpy here soon.