Dear Mum, I too have an alcoholic son and have experienced much of what you have. I also feel I have been manipulated for years and continue to give my son money to keep him from living on the streets. I have been working very hard on detaching and it helps. Talking to others who have been where I am and advice from Al Anon have helped me. I'm still struggling with letting go but have set boundaries and will not talk to him if he's been drinking. I now turn off my phone at night. If something happens, I won't know and won't be able to bail him out. I've learned that as much as I want him to change, I can't make him and it has to be up to him. I still pray every night that he will. Good luck and just know that you are not alone.