Great job winkster for getting back to your plan and goals. One thing that was causing me a lot of guilt was that as a parent, I felt that alcohol was removing me from my family. I would drink wine and hang out but it would disconnect me from really consciously, actively participating in play with my kiddo, which kiddo needs and wants. I would do it, but I wasn't 100% connected all the time. I felt I was coming up short and could do better. Even just thinking about that now makes me feel awful. I work hard and have a happy and healthy child who gets lots of affection and attention BUT I can and will do better.