This is often a delicate issue for me. Unfortunately, entertaining clients is an enormous part of my husband's job, and we are often in drinking situations. I don't have a hard time not drinking, but I'm often asked WHY I'm not drinking. It's a fine line in this situation. I hardly want to share with these people that I'm an alcoholic, because like it or not, we need to present a professional front, while still enjoying a good time (we are, after all, trying to get these people's business). Clients usually like to drink (sometimes a lot), especially since we're picking up the tab. The last thing you want to do is make them feel guilty for enjoying their evening with a cocktail. The bottom line is that gaining business this way is a very, very important part of my husband's job. I love him and want to help him, especially because he stood by me through years of my very obnoxious drinking. He counts on me during these evenings, because I tend to be a chatterbox and it's so much easier for him when I carry the conversation. I'm happy that I can help him this way, and he often brags to friends and family about how great it is to have me beside him. What's a girl to do?
It depends on the situation. I might get the waiters attention prior to a meal and work out a system, where I usually ask for a vodka tonic, and get club soda with lime (I know, I know...it's dishonest, but sometimes the simplest way works the best). I might claim to be the designated driver that night, so that my husband can indulge (this can backfire, because it can be taken as passing judgement...which one of your guests will have to step up and volunteer to be the designated driver in their party?). I can use the old "I'm on antibiotics" or something similar, but I hate to get into additional conversation that makes me tell any more lies, like having to elaborate on what's wrong with me.
In any other situation, when I don't care what anyone thinks, my favorite answer is "I have no talent for drinking" (paraphrasing Jane Austin's quote from Mansfield Park "I have no talent for certainty"). Sometimes I just say that I'm an alcoholic, unless it's just too much information for the situation (not great over pizza with the other parents after a Little League game). Sometimes I just say I'd rather have a coke that day. Sometimes I don't say anything and change the subject when questioned. Sometimes nobody gives a fiddlers fart whether I drink or not, which is fine by me!
I know I'm opening myself up for criticism here..."YOU SHOULD BE PROUD OF YOUR SOBRIETY!", but sometimes there are mitigating factors involved. These are just a few of the ways I deal with this sometimes sticky situation. How about you?
