Welcome VR. I keep saying that the road to being sober is self honesty. For the most part alcoholics are in denial of having a problem with alcohol. Amounts drank vary with many of us, it's what happens to us when we drink. Happy, angry, abusive, sullen etc. It usually not a positive outcome we planned. The most direct way to overcome it is not picking up the first drink one day at a time. I suggest reading posts here and AA as a positive way also. BE WELL