Eeek..I didn't mean my post to be interpreted as Acheleus attention seeking. I think the still small sober self needed to come here and say something in hopes someone would talk some sense. I am really afraid of your decision to "go back out" Acheleus...but there's nothing I can do. You have been fighting really, really hard...since the very beginning but it's been such a hard fight for you. I know you're tired...words fail me. I can't give you confidence in sobriety..no one can. We can root for you...support you. But you're mind has to believe in sobriety..has to believe that it holds the answers for you. I fear it is leaning in the other direction..the scales are tipped the wrong way. You feel the answers are in the dark. I am very, very very sad to see you go. You have no idea how sad.