Zen,
I totally sympathize, as I'm still having trouble getting over my AXBF. It's been about 6 weeks since he vanished and we've gone NC. I agree with everyone that grieving comes in waves, and that there's no time limit when it comes to healing.
As far as her dating right away, just remember that she isn't seeing reality since she's living in alcoholism. Sure, it'd be easy to 'move on' with someone new when you emotionally block people/live in denial. I bet it'd be easy for you to move on if you denied your own emotions and reality, right? But, since you aren't doing those things (good job!), you're going to be much happier and healthier in the long run.
I recently came across my ex on the dating site where we met. I'm sure he was back on there right after he went AWOL, without hesitation. It's hurtful to see, for sure. But I try to just focus on the reality and remember that he won't treat any new woman any better than he treated me.