Hey nbay, I'm sure more people who have experienced this and come out the other side will be along to respond to your post, but I wanted to say that I am currently in the middle of the same s*** (in terms of wanting closure yet being reminded again and again that he is not capable of giving me the kind of acknowledgement of his responsibility that I want) and wanted to give you my support and a hug. Don't beat yourself up for anything. Know that wherever you end up in your journey will be a better place than you are today and this is just a natural part of the process!