jkb- What are the right tools? He's not a "spiritual" person and for him AA equals religion. Going to therapy (couples counselling) was his first experience with "psychology"-for this scientific guy, AA, therapy, Counselling, is all "hokus pokus"....
He needs facts and proof and I guess if I leave, I may get through to him, or maybe not. Who knows. I guess, again I must focus on me and how I feel and what I need. I just find it difficult to accept that since he's causing most of the grief, I must take my stuff and my kids and move out....I know, life's not fair, but I'm just tired.
Thank you all again for being great support.