AD killing herself
I havent been here in a while. My daughter, who is only 21 and an extreme alcoholic (starting, unbeknownst to me at the age of 14) spent a few months in treatment at the beginning of the year. She was doing better and I could tell she was happier. But... she relapsed, spiraled out of control and I had to kick her out of the house. (She is allowed to live with me as long as she is not actively drinking AND in treatment.)
She moved to another city 2 hours away with her girlfriend, who supports her 100%. I get the occasional late night drunken call, telling me how she misses me, loves me and so on, and other than that, my life with my 3 other kids is pretty peaceful.
About a month ago my daughter called worried about blood in her stool. I told her she needed to go see a doctor, that it could be a number of things, but it is likely related to her drinking.
Of course, she has not gone to see a doctor and it appeared she had laid off the hard alcohol and has only been drinking beer. Progress? In her eyes, yes.
Yesterday, she posted on facebook, 2 "small" (not the minis) bottles of alcohol. Her girlfriend called me later that evening and told me she was incapacitated laying down, not moving. She was worried, saying she still has a pulse, but she is scared. THat my daughter admitted to also throwing up blood.
The girlfriend also said she doesnt buy her alcohol, that my daughter will go out and pan handle for money to buy it. The girlfriend has been told by many people that she cant save my daughter, that she's pretty much gone, but she wont let her go.
I feel so bad for her girlfriend. I have recommended she go to Al-Anon, but she is not that developed and doesnt have enough insight to understand my daughter's addiction.
Every day I worry about her imminent demise. I have very little hope of recovery any more. I think of it as if my daughter has a terminal illness and I am just waiting for the day that it kills her. THat is how this illness feels. It's like a cancer.
Anyhow, I have gone to Al-Anon, but recently have not been able to get to a meeting. Im wondering if anyone who has dealt with similar has any suggestions or techniques for me to cope and live in peace, despite the fact that my daughter really truly is killing herself and there really isnt anything that I can do to help her as long as she wont help herself.
I thank you for any comments, advice or suggestions.