Originally Posted by cr995

Yes I painfully would say that it is NC as well - but why I say the silent treatment is that

I had a lot of this for years WHILE we were living together - just before I left, he would talk and joke with any and everybody then he would come into the house and not even make eye contact with me - he would just blank me as if I was not there - this could go on for weeks, months.

I then retreated to a seperate living room and he turned up one day and handed me a meal he had made for me and then left. I realise now that was probably remorse.

Last year we were both at my daughters house - when I came into one room he got up and went out into another, in the same company he would just look through me as if I was not there. At her wedding he did the same thing - the whole day!

It was awkward and embarassing for everyone and he did not care about her. When she tried talking to him he said I was a serial adultress and now he had to live his own life.

I am VERY familiar with the silent treatment he did it to me on holiday and at the weekends, christmas any special occasssions and then towards the end of what ever celebration he would give me some stupid present like an elaborate meal.

In 2005 he moved out and stopped talking to me for a year! Blanked me when he picked up the kids , put the phone down on me if I called etc and then one day out of the blue sent me an email telling me he loved me and wanted to go on holiday with me - we went - he spent most of the time in the bar, and moved back in as if nothing had ever happened.


When I first moved out he initially told me on the phone that he really missed me and life was more fun with me in it that out of it, It felt to me like too little too late but I came back and spent 2 weeks with him the following year and he spent nearly the whole time drunk.

I say it is the silent treatment because it has elements - he treats me like I don't exist - so when I get abusive emails that actually feels better.

I don't know what I am trying to convince myself of here - but I do see that I am dealing with an alcoholic and life without him will maybe be less painful.

I probably should be grateful for the situation because otherwise I would be back in a flash and then would never heal.