Ignore anything your XW ever told you about being a "Man".. I LOVE sensitive, creative, and emotional men. Not just for company but sexually too. I've been told what I am looking for is a "lesbian in a man's body."
I have this gay friend who takes me out on "dates". He's always dressed perfectly and dances so beautifully. Honestly, even though he is gay, he feels like more of a man to me than any of the straight guys I know. And when I am with him, I feel like more of a woman.
If you're not the beer guzzling, football watching, porn watching type, GOOD. Embrace it. I think being a "man" is about having the courage to be yourself, and like TG said, ignoring society's norms.
Maybe your XW's issue was more about how she felt about herself as a woman. She was looking to you to help her define her feminity or something, and when you didn't do it, she blamed you for not being masculine enough?? It's just a thought.