Jazzfish,
for me, the real turnaround came when i knew myself to be a drunk. it was a moment of clarity where i went from 'i have this problem with alcohol' to 'this is who i am'.
a totally different thing: i had accepted my behaviours and usual inability to control the stuff/myself around the stuff, but it was still all about what i was doing. in that moment, i saw that it's about who i am.
which is where it is similar to what murrill says: and that I was an alcoholic even between drinks.
when i saw that, something changed. the 'never' that was impossible for me to stick to or really fathom while i was seeing this as a behaviour/actions around booze became an immediate obvious relief-of-sorts that now that i know who i am, there is no question about it.
i realize this is not helpful in terms of a "how-to", but it's all i got!