Originally Posted by
DreamsofSerenity 
Zen,
I think the fighting makes things intense because there is so much upset followed by the ecstasy of the make-ups. It's a like a roller coaster ride of emotions. Plus, alcoholics are spontaneous and unpredictable. They call in the middle of the night, want to have sex in public, show up places unexpectedly etc.. All these things make the relationship intense. Not healthy but intense.
Zen, I feel like you got messed up with an alcoholic by chance, and are suffering because well, it sucks to be with an alcoholic. But you don't really strike me as a serious codie.You seem to have the right ideas about everything, and just need some time to meet the right woman. I feel like a healthy relationship is in your future. Do you agree?
Thanks for the compliment. I must be doing something right! Actually you just described part of my relationship with the xagf, sex in public, etc. Intense, fun and addictive. One of the codie characteristics I exhibit is I have had a hard time saying no and standing up for stuff in fear of the other person rejecting me, and when people call me out on something regardless of if it is my fault or not, in the past I have taken that to be a relationship ending event.
My x before her was bipolar. I see a lot of me in these forums believe it or not. I'm just really trying to fix me because I know if I don't I'm going to get wrapped up in another unhealthy extreme.