Originally Posted by
Heartsmiles 
So evidently Mr. Hammer, although the intervention did not hypothetically take place, the thought of it in Mrs. Hammers mind ultimately did send her to where she needed to be and saved her life.
Sure. The whole thing was a fall-out of a Step 11 thing I was working.
Longer story, but her sponsor completely freaked on her when she figured out that Mrs. Hammer had been lying to her.
The thought of trouble coming her way sent her into a frenzy of trying to ;convince people she didn't have a problem, which she obviously knew she did, or she wouldn't have tried to convince peeps otherwise.
Yep. All addicts lie. First they lie about the addiction, then they lie to cover the addiction. Finally the Knight of Mirrors (like in Don Quixote, Man of La Mancha) takes them down.
I am very happy for your wife, her family, friends and her hubby ( you)
Not so quick there.
The rehab site totally botched the mental illness part. The rehab site was very incompetent. She is whacked now. Basically they took away her coping mechanism (the Eating Disorder) and put nothing in its place to deal with the mental illness behind it.
On the track things are on, we are likely to split up, and the kids fear and avoid her. Only one in the family who will have much to do with her is her mom who is a raging codependent, who does more harm than good.
I do disagree though about it having anything to do with lack of respect, to much respect, control or controlled direction for the loved one, but rather a great concern regarding life and death.
I believe interventions are brought about out of love to try to not only help them but support them by offering options. Options not readily available or thought of to most addicts. Interventions offer guidance, information, compassion and a lot of love. I view as an effort, a big effort to save a beloved family member or friend who is on a downward spiral that could end in a life of broken hearts, broken dreams, misery, despair, depression and to often, death.
Just my opinion.
Understood. On the opinion part. Not saying that for any or many or most it is not a great thing. Dunno, and all outside my scope. I am just saying that for us, there would have been more fight in that than healing. She has a terrible case of Texas-sized pride. In our case she had to beat herself down.
I do hope your wife gets that emotionail help she needs and deserves. It is heartbreaking living in that heightened state of suffering and stress.
It is a serious mental health issue, and she has the knowledge and skills to get help, but will not. (MS in Social Work, works in rehab, herself).
She is sort of caught in a lying trap. Lies to her sponsor. Lies to the kids. Lies to her mom. Lies to the therapists. On and on. Was lying to me, but I quit taking the crap.
Chapter 5 of the Big Book says Rigorous Honesty is required. Dunno. Good Luck to her on that.
In the end her stuff is between her and God. May she find Him now. Not Mr. Hammer's (me) problem. I have three kids to look out for, and none of them are named Mrs. Hammer.