Originally Posted by
Hammer 
Dunno. I could not do that to Mrs. Hammer. I respect(ed?) her too much to try to control or direct her.
Her AA sponsor wanted me to do a full blown hootenanny intervention, and my (Alanon) sponsor said that he thought it was good idea but to me it felt VERY WRONG (just saying for me/us) and instead I cautioned Mrs. Hammer that trouble was coming her way, and she would probably need to go to rehab.
Her sponsor threatened to "fire" her, and Mrs. Hammer went running around to any/everyone who may listen trying to explain that she did not need rehab. However everyone laughed, and said OF COURSE YOU NEED TO GO. NOW.
Made her so crazy she went into hyper-exercise, and near starvation. Finally she broke down and was begging to go. Even went earlier than I had planned.
She was down near 90 pounds at check in -- any less and they would have hospitalized her instead.
But rehab broke the Eating Disorder. She has been a total mess emotionally and behavior-wise since, but no relapse on the Eating Disorder, and I am told that is a Miracle, in itself. So Praise God, where there is Praise to Be Given.
So evidently Mr. Hammer, although the intervention did not hypothetically take place, the thought of it in Mrs. Hammers mind ultimately did send her to where she needed to be and saved her life. The thought of trouble coming her way sent her into a frenzy of trying to convince people she didn't have a problem, which she obviously knew she did, or she wouldn't have tried to convince peeps otherwise.
I am very happy for your wife, her family, friends and her hubby ( you)
I do disagree though about it having anything to do with lack of respect, to much respect, control or controlled direction for the loved one, but rather a great concern regarding life and death.
I believe interventions are brought about out of love to try to not only help them but support them by offering options. Options not readily available or thought of to most addicts. Interventions offer guidance, information, compassion and a lot of love. I view as an effort, a big effort to save a beloved family member or friend who is on a downward spiral that could end in a life of broken hearts, broken dreams, misery, despair, depression and to often, death.
Just my opinion.
I do hope your wife gets that emotional help she needs and deserves. It is heartbreaking living in that heightened state of suffering and stress.