thanks for the replies.
aw58, it saddens me to read to your story - that's my concern for her, the place she'll inevitably end up in...
lexie: I hear you... i don't think my heart likes the answer to the deal-breaker question but it feels like my heart knows what the answer is - quite clearly, in fact. in this case, the heart knows what it doesn't want. and what it doesn't want is to watch her fall apart, whether slowly or quickly, over time... just can't.