(((((fourmaggie)))))
She is an A!!!!!!! She has 7 years and is still learning about herself and does not take kindly to what 'she perceives' as someone telling her what to do or that she was wrong, and YES her ACTIONS in your HOME were WRONG.
Step away, go No Contact. It took years (and I do mean a lot more than 7) to learn how to accept what I perceived as criticism of me and/or my actions, and to take another look at me.
Somewhere down the road she either do a step 9 or 10 to you or instead will let this sit in her 'basket' and grow into a real good excuse along with others to pick up again.
You did nothing wrong. Take those DEEP SLOW breathes to calm yourself. In AA you will hear said "some are sicker than others" and we ain't talking about the newcomers, lol.
This sounds like one of those instances that "Let Go and Let God" applies real well!
Love and hugs,