Hahaha! Marcher, I would never suggest your bread be anything other than healthy, the way you cook it should be on prescription for everyone!! No, it was the half a pound of butter I would slather on it which would undo all your good and then some!!
Lifet you know my thoughts sweetheart, I will say here what I said to you; if I had gone through what you went through, so early in my own sobriety, I am not remotely sure that I would have kept clean. Not only all the emotional pain, or the stress of the travelling, but the temptation ' on tap' 24/7 would have been too much to handle. Please don't be hard on yourself. I echo Marcher, you will always be one of us, and one day soon, there will be fireworks for your 100th.
Let us know of your safe return to the land of Oz sweetheart, and allow yourself to heal, you are still grieving.