ok, the demand for sex things always creeps me out. that speaks volumes about how he SEES you....as an object to fulfill his needs.
it is not unreasonable to want to be valued, respected, and treated with dignity. to want a father to ACT like a father, devoted to his children.
however, it's not likely you'll GET that from your RAH any time soon. you aren't asking him to change a behavior, like leaving dirty socks in the living room, you are asking him to change his personality. to seek treatment for a potential diagnosis of bipolar - which if true is not quickly or easily remedied. you are asking him to change his outlook on the world...from selfish to selfless. to foster a compassion and affection that he may not possess.