Thread: hey
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Old 06-02-2013, 10:19 PM
  # 15 (permalink)  
StevenT
Member
 
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Portland, OR
Posts: 321
I am 21, have been in the rooms since 2011. I have relapsed many times, now am sitting at just over 4 months. I have not been exactly where you are at, but I can identify with the guilt and shame of going back into the rooms, around the people that were rooting for me, showing me kindness and love. I know what it is like to raise my hand for less then 30 days again, to admit to all of the people that I used again, that I drank again. What I was told is that it is my natural state to be under the influence, and it is a miracle to not be. If people beat you up for NOT being a miracle, they are not the ones you need to listen to because they don't understand that. You need to go back for you, not for them. So what they think is none of your business, what you think is. Same as what they do is none of your business, but what you do is.

And as far as your sponsor firing you, can't fire someone that isn't paid, and if he decides to stop working with you then he isn't the person you want to work with.

Simple, but not easy. You don't need willpower, you need wantpower. Want this thing, and do this thing.
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