One of the reasons I continue to visit this website is to see how common and repeating
these patterns are. We all think our 'addictive adventures' are in some way unique.
But they are in NO WAY UNIQUE.
Here's a thought experiment. Jump on Google and find a website where ADDICTS
agonize over the hurt, worry, angst, and destruction they cause. You won't find it.
Not unless they are in recovery. They are in what I call FEBM/FTC mode (the 'F' you can
guess) ...but the 'EBM' stands for 'everyone but me' and the 'TC' stands for 'the consequences'.
Nobody in that mode is reachable. Expending huge effort in attempting to do so
is a waste of resources.
And yes, this is as good as active addiction gets. The only direction it will go is downward.
In my experience these are tenets without exception.