As I read your post, I also wondered what you see in this man. But,
I could have written your post and my friends also wondered what I saw in my AH. So, I say this with the most love and compassion for you.
You are teaching him how to treat you. He is not displaying real love to you (There's a recent post on here about real love. I think AnvilHead posted it.)
Please don't force your children to be exposed to this man, who treats their mother horribly and who steals from them.
Living in constant chaos and turmoil is no way to live!
Please take others' advice and go to Nar-Anon or Al-Anon. Begin to bring the focus of your life back to you and your kids.
A huge congratulations on your
FIVE YEARS!!!!